I should know, because I am one.
I came across an article by Yen Len Espiritu. The title of it was already interesting in itself:
"We Don't Sleep around like White Girls Do:" Family, Culture and Gender in Filipina American Lives.
The article explained how a minority group would demoralize the superior group. The Filipinas boasted that their children aren't like the White girls. That they are sexually sacred due to their Filipino culture and values.
That their children grow up more grateful because the Filipino children understand the value of family before anything.
Based off my personal experiences of being part of the second generation, it is true. We are taught to put family first. Always be surrounded by family and to always be sexually sacred by staying chaste.
Practicing these values have shaped me to be a better and successful person. However the plan is a flaw in itself. By putting in our energy and effort into holding up the beliefs of our parents,
we are trapped.
Trapped because family can hold us down when we try to reach higher on the success ladder.
That's why in Espiritu's article, the Filipino Americans would say they wish they didn't have the responsibility of always being with their families. They want to be like the Whites who can go out and go to far away schools and go away to be successful.
Their is a lot that can be said about immigrant parents and the next generations.
But it all comes down to how the immigrant parents decide to raise their children.
Entirely with Filipino values.
Assimilated into the American culture.
Or mixed.
And it is up to the child on how they take these upbringings and make it their own.
Work Cited:
"We Don't Sleep around like White Girls Do": Family, Culture, and Gender in Filipina American Lives
Signs , Vol. 26, No. 2 (Winter, 2001), pp. 415-440
Published by: The University of Chicago Press
Article Stable URL: http://www.jstor.org/stable/3175448
As a filipino first generation child, I do feel the restriction of my parents when it comes to attaining my goals in life. They always emphasize family first before everything. Yes, I do follow that belief but it should not keep me from successful in life. After I graduated high school, I wanted to go to San Jose State to pursue the career of Nursing. My parents like the idea of me studying it but they do not like where I was going to do it because I will be far away from them. They wanted for me to be as close to home as possible thats why I ended going to CSUN and experience the struggle to get in to nursing schools. In San Jose State, I was already in the undergraduate nursing program but I traded it for my family's happiness It was really hard for me being in that situation. I was torn in between my family's desire and my goals. If would of went to SJSU, I will be most likely to be graduating next year with a BSN in Nursing . As of now, I am still undergraduate applying for a radiology program.
ReplyDeleteI can’t say I understand how where you are coming from. I can say that reading your words about being trapped are eye opening. I’ve never really tried to look at that way. Feeling trapped in something as influential as your own culture has to be burdensome and ultimately a harrowing experience. There must be times where you want to say F’ it but you can’t. I don’t honestly know what I would do in that situation.
ReplyDeleteI read the article as well and found it to be informative as my knowledge of Filipino values was considerably limited. The idea of remaining chaste and being conservative in one's approach to dating seems to align with the Christian values that are professed by many in the United States, but actually following through seems to be an exception in a society which has grown accustomed to behavior that is more promiscuous in nature. This reality allows Filipino women to feel strong and consistent because they practice values that are indicative of a moral upbringing.
ReplyDeleteAs you said, parents play a vital role and the decisions they make become an integral part of a child's development. Furthermore, the ideas that they try to instill in their children will be more effective if they actually live by those standards.