When it
comes to dating, Asian males always have a hard time. I believe
that I can treat women how they wanted to be treated. Also, I am descent
looking and I can be romantic like taking girls on a long walks on a beach. I can provide what women are looking for but I still get rejected. getting turned down is part of dating but one of the most disturbing
rejections that I got was during my my freshman year in Cal State Northridge. This woman told me that she cannot date me because I am Asian!
What is wrong of being Asian?
One of the reasons maybe Asians does not get
a lot of success in dating is because the stereotypes that society . Media is one of the sources that create the false point of view of
the popular culture toward males of Asian descent.
The video talks about how media desexualize
Asian men. According to Yul Kwon, he grew up believing that he can only be
nerdy or martial art specialist because that what media was
showing him how Asians should be. Also, Aasif Mandvi pointed out that most
Asian characters in TV shows, like “Heroes”, does not know how to speak English.
Not all Asian males are nerdy, know
kung fu, or cannot speak English. I don’t know any Kung Fu and I know how to
speak English.
Yul Kwon’s achievement of winning “Survivor” shows that Asian men are capable
of doing things more of what society expected.
Media's view of Asian men through TV shows creates the idea that all of us are nerdy, Kung Fu masters who do not speak English. This message transfers to the minds of popular culture. In results, it affects woman's views towards males of Asian descent as potential partners.
The media's effect in society is so strong that ,according to Robnett, Belinda, and Cynthia
Feliciano’s (2011) research
about preference of internet daters, the most excluded individuals were black women, Asian men,
Middle Eastern, and Asian Indians when it comes to dating.
The Stereotypes greatly affect Asian males that they are one of the
least wanted partners in society. This restricts Asians from dating who
ever we wanted.
Fortunately, there are women in our
society who over looks the stereotypes. They are open minded enough to know that
Asian men are not what society thinks about them. These women view Asian men as
real men that has to potential to be their partners in their lives .
I totally agree with that being an Asian American male it is quite difficult for me to date girls. They always assume that I am nerdy or super shy. And true even before getting to know the person they already automatically judge them. Because the stereotype is built in us since we were little unconsciously in that when we are kids we believe what we see on television because we think it must be real. In today’s society we are so heavily reliant on technology that we can no longer see the truth because we view media and technology as an absolute.
ReplyDeleteby Jonathan Saavedra
I had no idea who Yul Kwon was until I watched the video above. His comments at the end of the video are probably the best I have heard about the media’s portrayal of Asians. The best kind of change is brought about from the inside out. Filmmakers need to take more risk. There will be a time where people become tired of seeing the same type of actors on the big screen. Even I, as a white person, am becoming increasingly tired of it. We live in a multicultural society that is becoming more diverse everyday. I would like my media to reflect that culture.
ReplyDeleteI really hate how strongly stereotypes are enforced, not just the discrimination that stereotypes bring. When it comes to the demasculinization of the Asian American male, I feel like they have it rough. They have done nothing wrong and women tend to treat them like they are a walking plague. One year for halloween, I had a bunch of friends dress up as nerds. Some of my friends that did this were Asian. They faced a lot of crap that night because people made rude comments saying, "well that's nice...you didn't even have to buy a costume this year", implying that on a daily basis they already are just nerds.
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to the media's influence, I feel like it's the most destructive tool for the Asian Male Ego. Not only does it paint this wrong picture for everyone to see and believe, but it can start to make these Asian men themselves feel that that's all they are to the world.
While I am miles away from being a guru of all things women, I would say that the best way to break through the evasive interracial barrier is to not think about it, and be yourself! Convey yourself as confidently as you possibly can without boasting. Stereotypes can only limit a person if they truly believe that they are true. It is a shame that we have to live with the footprints of our ancestors that many considered to be foreigners, thus being inherently passed down to us, but it is our job as the second/third/fourth generation to educate ourselves and other people of societal norms that should be broken.
ReplyDeleteI read an article in the New York Times that Asian Americans are outmarrying less, so maybe trends are starting to turn in the favor of API men looking for API women. I think you're right though. The fact that API men are painted to be dehumanized caricatures of one aspect of the male psyche is totally bogus and needs to be changed. I hope one day that we all can see a leading API couple on the big screen in a romantic comedy at least. While there are issues with stereotypes about most people of color, I feel that you hit the nail on the head with just how awful its affects can be with API men. Change has to come from popular culture, but how can we change that? One person at a time I hope.
ReplyDeleteI think you’re right on. Stereotypes do affect someone’s perception if they will consider dating Asians. One of my closest friends in high school (who was Asian as well), would not even consider dating Asians. I never really asked why because I’ll admit, at one point I did have the same view. I think that had to do with many of my friends not being Asian. So their perception of Asians I guess you can say, influenced me at the time. If Asian males get more leading roles as the romantic, that would definitely show them in a different light.
ReplyDelete